Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Let the games begin...

I haven't posted for a couple days because the onslaught of paperwork and appointments has already kicked my butt. No, it hasn't got me on the ropes yet, but it definitely takes lots and lots of time to make sure everything is checked and double checked as we move forward. Finding out that we have not one, but two oncologists as well as the need for a dental appointment to get fluoride trays made was somewhat surprising. Also, our "start date" being moved out was somewhat startling. The decision of whether it's best for my sweet patient to return to work for a couple weeks to attempt to reset his leave time is another question we will attempt to deal with today.  Coming to terms with what is ahead (inclusive of, but not limited to, adding a feeding tube prior to radiation treatments, getting fitted for the tattooed superhero mask, the treatment trial runs, and dealing with a mild case of claustrophobia), all add to the fun. Seriously, it's almost the antithesis of preparing for childbirth. The trade-off is NOT wanting to bring a little bundle home from the hospital when all is said and done. Thus far, we have found that humor will need to be a major coping mechanism. For example, "Hey, honey. At least I won't have to invest in a Halloween mask this year."

If  I could take this awful short-term future away from my husband, you gotta know I would!! Every time I say "we", it is really "he" that has to deal with the harsh realities to come. All I can really do is be present and observe. Not a fair deal, in my estimation. "We" will play the hand we've been dealt and kick this thing to kingdom come and look forward to a springtime renewal of hope.  Wish us luck...we're off!

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